I have nothing to say about this song, except that we have remained ridiculously amused by it for a number of years. Thanks to WGCDR Johnson and Midshipman Louise for their assistance in recording this version of the masterpiece. As I say at the end of the track, “Genius”.
Today I saw a cat and thought of you
Today I read your blog and thought of you
Today I got your postcard
Today I walked to Carlton
Today I ordered flowers and thought of you
Did you think of me when you were eating crepes in Hampstead?
Did you thing of me when you were defacing currency?
When the dodgy French men
Touched you inappropriately
Did you think of me?
Esther, you are the best-er
I wrote some fanfic
Where you came back to Australia
Esther, oh yes we missed ya
I had a dream where Gary kissed ya
In a bulldozer
Today I saw a Mormon and thought of you
Today I saw some Orthodox Jews and they made me think of you too
Today I saw a book, I saw a fridge, I saw some houses
Today I saw a cup of tea, but no tartan troosers yet
Today I saw the sky and though of you
Did you think of me too?
Esther, did you think of me too?
Esther, you are the best-er
Esther, did you think of me too?
Wing Commander Johnson (of VB fame) was still overseas, and some members of the Northcote Military TATU of Death (NMTOD) convened in her absence. We decided to write a song for her. The result a bit silly, but awesome nevertheless. I think I shall just go through the references so this song makes sense to anyone who is not the writer, the subject, or a very close friend.
Verse 1
• WGCDR Johnson likes cats. Perhaps more that is strictly natural. But you can’t blame her, because she has many very lovely cats in her life. You might be able to hear in the background of the last chorus I’m singing, “Cats, cats, cats, cats . . .”
• She was away, she kept a blog and sent hilarious postcards.
• She used to live in Carlton.
• And she used to work for the Phone Order Flower Company Of Doom (POFCOD?). I used to ring her up there and make her talk to me instead of answering customer calls. It seemed like a pretty cushy call centre from the outside.
Verse 2
• Hampstead Creperie. Enough said, really.
• Members of NMTOD have engaged in many illegal activities over the years. One of these was a mission to write “Northcote Military TATU of Death IS COMING!” on as many overseas paper notes (euros, pounds, etc) as possible, with the aim that one of us would eventually be somewhere in Europe and would get one that someone else had written on. We also played this game by writing on the bottom of bunk beds in hostels. FUN TIMES!
• Dodgy French men. They are lecherous. Um, I am also a lech.
Chorus
• Esther rhymes with very few words. Jester. Molester. Fester. None of which are particularly fun to put in songs. So we just went with “best-er”. Because we’re dorks.
• Fanfic! This song is fanfic.
• Gary = Gary Oldman. WGCDR Johnson had previously written a song called “Kissing Gary Oldman”. Which was brilliant. Is brilliant. I think we should record it.
• WGCDR Johnson also had (has?) an obsession with earthmovers, particularly bulldozers. Which is too cool for words, really!
Verse 3
• Mormons. I can’t quite remember, but there was a good reason we referenced them. Oh, yeah, that. Never mind.
• Orthodox Jews. Heh. There’s a game, rather like Punch Buggy but for people wearing Jewish headgear. And yes, I realise how utterly un-PC and possibly offensive this is. Sometimes I get extra points because I’m the first one to punch for Midshipman Louise. Anyway, it’s one punch for someone with a kippar or yarmulke, two for someone with sidelocks (peyos) and a black hat, and the ultimate is for a Chasidic Jewish man in one of those awesome furry black hats (). I can’t quite remember how many punches we gave for women with wigs or other hair coverings.
• Tartan troosers refers to our time in Scotland, and a little ditty we composed there. I can’t quite remember it – WGCDR Johnson may comment here and tell us?
Wow. I hope you don’t all think I’m a horrible person, now? Maybe I shouldn’t have chosen to put up a song with so many offensive cultural references. Eek!
WGCDR Johnson has also reminded me to point out that this song is almost identical in chord structure (and tune) to parts of Christy Moore’s “Foxy Devil”, which is one of the songs we listened to as we drove around Scotland and became whisky snobs (OK, I know Christy Moore is Irish, and that his song is about ‘whiskey’ rather than ‘whisky’, but never mind!). You can download a preview of it here.
Recording
Although it was written by a good portion of NMTOD, I recorded it by myself. Because I’m mean like that, and also we couldn’t get everyone together to record. The first thing I want to say is this: AHAHAHAHA! RECORDERS! They amuse me greatly. Kind of follows from last week’s folkiness.
I recorded this on ProTools, so all of the harmonies, etc, are probably a result of me juggling the 8 stereo (or 16 mono) tracks available on the free version. Yeah, I still miss ProTools. GarageBand is just not the same. I have freshened up the track a bit this week, by feeding it whole into GarageBand and fiddling a bit with the EQ and suchlike on the master track. It’s just a subtle difference, but it gives it a bit more depth and brightness.
It’s not a fantastic quality recording, but it has energy.
Conclusion
I like this song because it’s fun and lighthearted. There have been a lot of serious songs on this site over the last couple of months, and I am not always such a serious songwriter, you know! And yeah, I’m scrambling to get this posted before Sunday ends (even though I had the debate AGAIN with Midshipman Louise last night about Sunday actually being the FIRST day of the week – IT IS!), and already trying to figure out what I’ll post in the coming week, because I’ve been too busy to write and record much. Which is crap, but ah well. I have a couple of options up my sleeve.
As usual, feel free to share with people, but please link them to this post rather than directly to the download. Thank you!
CHORUS:
Away, oh-wey
I was only a girl when we parted
Away, oh-wey, oh
I was only sixteen
You know what that means:
There were people like him.
He said I was the one,
His moon and his sun,
And I, being young, didn’t know better
CHORUS:
He was a rambling man,
Was never tied down,
But he promised me now
That we would always be true
Our love like the dew
On the roses in the morning:
Pristine and new
And I swear the smile on this face could have persuaded angels from grace
And his beautiful eyes never gave his lying lips away
CHORUS:
He left me one morning when summer was dawning
A child at my feet, said he had to be free.
He left me.
Oh, my darling, I love you, I need you
You said you would stay here and I believed you.
Don’t leave me alone with our baby
Stay here, stay here, don’t leave me.
He left me.
CHORUS:
Seven years later, our daughter has died,
It’s midnight and I hear a voice from outside.
He says, “I’ve come back for you, please let me in.”
He says he’s come back, and I am so grateful to him,
Grateful to him.
CHORUS:
“Oh my love, come sit by the fire
And tell me of your adventuring days!
Draw closer, I’ll stoke the flames higher
And you can tell me how you’ve changed your ways.
Our daughter has grown up, she’s tall and she’s healthy
And I never stopped loving you.
If you’re hungry, there’s food to go round here
If you’re thirsty I’ll bring you wine, too.”
And he set to drinking and boasting and leering
Til being so drunk he fell to the hearth.
I went to the kitchen and took up my carving knife
And I knelt beside him and cut out his heart.
CHORUS:
Judges and juries, how do you find me guilty of taking a life?
I could argue I was just claiming something that he’d always promised was mine.
And there’s one less monster to come for you daughters:
So I’ve helped yours where I couldn’t save mine.
Will you jail me, hang draw and quarter me?
Will it help you sleep better tonight?
Man, I love this song so much. I really understand if nobody else does, but I just love it! *Assertively displays folk heritage*
I wrote this as an antidote to the thinly veiled misogyny apparent in a lot of old folk songs about ugly, murderous, irrational women who betray, kill or otherwise do wrong by their men. There’s always another side to the story, surely. This post became a bit of a lesson on “women in Steeleye Span songs”, so bear with me!
I’ve always been a huge fan of SteeleyeSpan, and I think they’re an interesting case, because they often choose songs that are misogynist, but they alter them enough for their renditions to be a little more aware, a little more ironic. For instance, their version of Al[l]ison Gross stops at the point that the narrator is turned into “an ugly worm” by the witch after he has refused to become her lover and has insulted her continually. In some other versions he is turned back into a human by the faeries, but in this one he’s left as a worm/dragon as punishment for being an arsehole. You can hear their version in this (HILARIOUS!!!) YouTube video.
Then again, there are songs about traitors, such as the woman in Sir James the Rose, who betrays the knight to his death. Why, though? Why would she do this? I have my suspicions about him seducing her and only using her when he’s in dire circumstances. Bastard. Also, it pisses me off that James is a murderer, and the men who then kill him are murderers, but it’s the woman who gets punished as the moral of the story. Sheesh.
I don’t have a lot to say about the recording of this song, since it was so long ago. It’s one of the first songs I recorded by making a WALL O’ HARMONY! I started with the guitar and one vocal line, and built up the rest of the vocals around it. I wanted them to really give it an emotional punch, rather than to be all perfect and well-considered. I think it worked to a degree. One of the ways I did the harmonies was to record a few together, then mute the original melody, record another one, mute the second harmony and record another one. This way the harmonies are not all tied to the melody and guitar, and sometimes make for interesting tensions. Of course, sometimes it sounds dreadful, but it’s still fun, and I can just delete the awful ones!
What I Like, What I Don’t
I think there are bits of the recording that are very rough, and could have done with more tweaking, and there are a couple of off notes here and there. On the other hand, I do like that I didn’t figure out the harmonies before I started recording. As I said, it can take the song in different directions.
The thing I really like about this song is also the thing that I’m most ambivalent about – that is, the bloodthirsty delight in the murder. I think it does exactly what I want it to do – that is, it situates it as not being a completely irrational act, and it gets you on side with the narrator. I think that as an exercise in writing, it really works (of course, you can have a different opinion on that – let me know in the comments). On the other hand, I still have that liberal humanist voice in one ear saying that killing is never justifiable, and what am I doing trying to make it so? And then the feminist voice in my other ear tells me that is the voice of privilege, and my ears start having a war! Alarm!
Conclusion
Yes, it’s a folk song, and it’s kind of bloodthirsty. And it won’t be to everyone’s taste, I realise that. But I still really like it – despite the not-so-great recording quality, and the not-so-well-thought-out vocal harmonies, and the not-so-polished end product! It has an emoshun!
Note
Thank you very much to everyone who has linked to and/or commented on Divide Us Now. The number of hits that song has received is almost four times as many as any other I’ve posted here! I hope that a couple of you have stuck around and looked at the other songs! It’s good to have you on board.
Feel free to share this with other people, but please remember to link to this post rather than directly to the download. Thank you!
For whatever reason, I’ve been spending a lot of time on blogs recently, instead of on the boards I sometimes frequent. And I’ve been reading, specifically, lots of transwomen’s blogs. Usually I fall in with transguys on the internet, but recently I’ve been reading Sexual Ambiguities, Questioning Transphobia, and a couple of others. And I’ve been really shocked to realise that the terrible stuff you hear about (some, not all) radical feminists is actually true. There are some really horribly transphobic radfems out there, and they’re still being loudly transphobic to this day.
At one point during a recent (i.e. from this year) discussion, someone describing herself as a radical feminist broke out the Audre Lorde quote, “The master’s tools will never dismantle the master’s house”, arguing that transpeople who claim to be working against the oppression of women are, basically, liars, because we are ‘buying in’ to the gender system by transitioning. Of course, this neatly ignores the fact that not all transpeople jump straight out of one gender box and into another, and that many radical feminists, by defending a very narrow version of ‘women’, are reproducing and enforcing gender binaries, marginalising (and, yes, oppressing) other vulnerable minorities. It’s also a pretty ironic choice of quotation to start throwing around. Anyway, someone else in the comments thread picked this up and proceeded to argue that one of the master’s tools was division – setting people up against each other, and teaching them to refuse to listen to other points of view (Don’t you hear me? Don’t you see me?), to shut themselves off to other truths in situations (I know you don’t believe me; don’t believe in me).
This song was also influenced by an amusing situation I found myself in at a recent symposium at the University of Melbourne, sitting next to Sheila Jeffreys, who is quite notorious for her transphobia (or trans hate, or whatever). It was kind of bizarre. And over lunch I noticed that she didn’t really mingle with the other academics from Melbourne – whether or not that was by choice, or because they avoided each other, I don’t know. So, as I am wont to do, I read too much into it, started feeling sorry for her, started imagining that she was lonely, etc, etc, etc. Damn writer’s mind! Always making up stories! Anyway, hence the opening line of the song, and “Will you ever want this back?”
This song is partly my late contribution to the TDoR, but I would like to dedicate it especially to Queen Emily and Lisa.
Recording
Wow! This song I built almost entirely on GarageBand – I had a few lines and a tune in my head, then constructed the finished product around the software beats, a piano part that I played then sampled and repeated, an inbuilt bass guitar riff that I pitch shifted around, some fake strings and suchlike, and MANY, MANY HARMONIES! I know! I bet you weren’t expecting them at all!
Those of you with weirdly good aural memories might have picked up that a couple of the beats are almost exactly the same as ones I used in The Weatherman. This wasn’t intentional at all. I just picked out the ones that were an appropriate tempo, and that I liked the sound of. I guess this means that I have a tendency to write songs that are a similar speed, and that I am consistent in the percussion sounds I like. Maybe in the future I’ll pick a beat that I wouldn’t usually go for and write a song around that, as a little challenge.
Recording was . . . interesting. I used a LOT of software stuff, which is a bit challenging for me. I also used quite a few effects on the vocals (but all quite minor, except the REVERB!), in order to try to get a better EQ balance. I think it’s worked OK, though I really need to get a microphone if I want a better vocal quality.
Things I Like
I like the little vinyl crackles at the start and the end of the track. Hee! Because it’s a record, you see?! I’m quite fond of the sentiment of the song, too.
Things I Like Less
I think if I was going to write this song again, I would try to incorporate a bridge, as I think it’s a little repetitive. I’m not too sure about the fake strings, either. Maybe I should find some better software string sounds. I do wonder, also, if the sentiment comes through correctly with the words. I wrote a number of lines that didn’t make the final cut because they were a bit ham-fisted, and I fear that some of the ones I kept in aren’t much better. I hope it’s oblique and ambiguous enough (though I guess I’m the only one who can make such a subjective judgement for myself).
Conclusion
Yay! A new-new song! And I quite like it! I know I pretty much always say that, but there’s usually something I get from writing, recording or re-listening to them. I’ve spent so much time tweaking and mixing this one, though, that I can’t really objectively assess it at the moment – all I can hear are the faults. I’ll leave the objectiveness to your good selves – please let me know what you think!
Also – YES! The Liberals LOST THE ELECTION!!!
By all means, please share this song with people you think might be interested, but please link to this post rather than directly to the download. Thank you!
Said I’d write you a letter, and this is my letter to you
(How very Tim Freedman)
You’re feeling lonely and I know that place, too
When all of the oceans crystallise in my eyes
And the continents rise
And you’ve gone, will you come –
Do you call this place home?
When you go, when you come –
Do you call this home anymore?
Said I’d write you a love song, and this is a love song for you
(How very self-conscious)
All that I wanted to say come back to this
And the rest is all nonsense
All the world is smaller now, and all that time is shorter now
Now you’re coming, now you’re going –
Do you still have a place to call –
Now you’re going, now you’re coming –
Do you have a home anymore?
Do you have a home anymore?
Like I promised, here is part two of my ‘Songs Inspired by Special Agent Ross’ series.
This song is riffing on the theme of home – what is it, how do we decide what to call home, where is it, who is there? The going/coming (shoosh!) lyrics, the half-sentences, reflect that. If someone is coming home, that implies that the person thinking/speaking is already there. If someone is going home, it implies that they are going away from somewhere else. Where is that somewhere else? Is it possible to have two homes? I have a home here in Melbourne, but I’ll also refer to my parents’ place as home sometimes – after all, that’s where I grew up. When we lived in London for a bit with Midshipman Louise’s family, their house was a home, with the double layer of Midshipman Louise actually having lived there as a teenager.
The Tim Freedman line is a reference to The Whitlams‘ song “No Aphrodisiac”: A letter to you on a cassette, coz we don’t write anymore. I love the Whitlams, and I like that added home/Australia thing that the reference brings to the song. It’s all so intertextual and pomo. Ha.
Wah! I’m just getting in by the end of the week again – I really wanted to post this before the election results went live, because I may be spending the next week or so in jail for RIOTING if the Liberals get back in.
Recording
I wrote a whole thing about this, and then WordPress lost it. Serves me right for typing directly into the box. I can’t be bothered typing it again.
Conclusions
It’s funny to hear a vocal that is so controlled in some parts, while in other parts it’s completely lazy. Heh. Oh well, one day I will have awesome control again. JUST YOU WAIT! I hope you like the song, and I shall return you to recent material next week – hopefully a song I’ve been working on over the last few days!
Now, ELECTION PARTY. There will be much drinking. The theme for the night: CELEBRATE OR RIOT!
If you’d like to share this song with someone, please link them to this post rather than directly to the download. Thank you.
I’m sneaking in within the week! It’s Sunday! I’m so sorry I didn’t get something up earlier – all I can say is that I forgot, then I was busy. Tut-tut. I should learn to manage my time better.
I also want to say a big thank you to everyone who has commented on my last posts and listened to my little songs. I really appreciate getting feedback, even if it’s just, “I didn’t like this as much as last week’s song” (I will ask you why, though!) or “I like the guitar on this one” or “I’ll listen to it soon”. Of course I love it when people notice specific things about the lyrics or the music and share them with me, because I absolutely love getting other points of view.
So, onto this wee song. Special Agent Ross is one of my dearest friends, although he has been living most of his life in the UK for a number of years. I have a series of songs dragged out of how much I miss(ed) him, so although I’d much rather he was living here, it’s been very productive angst! This is the first in the series, so maybe I’ll post another one next week (i.e. in a few days). That way you can see a progression.
Recording
Again, one of my very lo-fi pieces. You can hear me bumping the computer keyboard at one point. I often do this thing where I think, “Oh, I’ll just make a very simple recording, with guitar and one vocal line,” and then I make it and go, “Hmm, what this really needs is A CHOIR OF ME in the background!” Sometimes I manage just so put in a couple of backing vocal lines to flesh it out, as was the case with this little piece.
Since doing home recording, actually, my songwriting process has changed a bit – I love post-production, so I’m much more likely to ‘build’ songs around a skeleton that I’ve pre-written. Not to a huge extent, but I think a lot more of my time is spent editing, tweaking . . . producing, I guess. Fun!
Like and dislikes
I like that this is such a short little thing (just over one minute), and I like the way that the backing vocals sort of creep up on the song, first used as another instrument, in a way. I like the harmonies in When you know that I miss you. I like the sparse sound of the guitar.
It was never really meant to be a good recording, more a way of keeping the idea for later, so my singing is not as great as it could be, and I haven’t tried to get rid of the iMac buzz. It seems that I’m always apologising for my singing. Maybe I should just stop, and note that really the reason for this is that I’m a creator of music rather than a singer, and that’s what I care about. So my singing is never going to be wonderful.
Conclusion
Sorry this is so late! I hope you enjoy it, even though it’s a wee little thing. I’d love to hear from you!
If you’d like to link someone to this song, please send them to this post rather than directly to the download.
I’ve seen people drowning
We didn’t save them
I’ve seen the pictures
I’ve heard you saying
We were protecting
Our arses
We didn’t see them
We didn’t know them
We didn’t need to
Can you honestly tell me
You think you’re right
Can you honestly tell me
You can kill these people
And sleep at night
I used to be proud
To call this my home
Now I’m ashamed I don’t believe you didn’t know
How can this happen here
In a place I thought was free
I wish I didn’t see you
I wish I didn’t know you
I wish I didn’t need to
Can you honestly tell me
You think you’re right
Can you honestly tell me
You can kill these people
You can kill these people
I have tried to write this commentary a number of times in the last few days. Each time I have ended up in tears. I am still utterly, utterly furious at the disgusting lies, repulsive attitudes and murderous behaviour of the Howard Government. I am still so angry and distraught that Australian citizens not only believed their lies, but voted them in again. Twice. I despair that people have forgotten this, or that they remember it and simply don’t give a shit and will vote for the Liberals again.
This song was written a while after the events, when my anger had stilled and hardened enough that I could make my fingers move to form chords on the guitar, and my despair had become enough part of me that I could begin to sing around it. It was written when I realised that these events had taken from me the faith I’d had in my idea of what Australia was and what it could be. It’s a nation state with borders and it’s exclusive and that unfortunately makes it a murdering machine. Depressing enough for you?
The original was recorded pretty speedily, and this fresh mix I mixed and recorded in one morning. I mis-recorded the vocals on the original, and there are a couple of words different to the song I actually wrote. But I think it works OK.
The original has rhythm/main guitar, lead vox, backing vox and a little lead/melody guitar. I’ve imported the original track, doubled it with different effects and EQ, added two separate vocals (one for layering, and one for emphasis), and a piano line to open up the bass a bit.
Well, I guess this is my first old me/new me duet!
What I Like, What I Don’t
I like the simplicity of the original, but I also like the bigger sound of the new one. I like that through this I was finally able to articulate some of the anger I carry around with me, and I like that I can post it here and have it recognised by other people. It’s therapeutic, in a way! Sorry to make you my unpaid therapists!
I dislike that the song exists, and that it’s still fucking relevant. I also think it’s a bit heavy-handed, but some things don’t deserve subtlety and poetics.
Conclusion
I thought I’d post this because there’s an election coming up. This is in place of a written rant on either my blog or my LJ about how very, very much I despise our current government. If ANY of you vote for the Liberal party in the coming election I will disown you. They are liars and killers.
This post will probably get me on the national insecurity blacklist, but what the fuck – I just re-watched V for Vendetta, and it was scary.
Please link all and sundry to this post. Get rid of the Liberals this election. It’s well past fucking time.
A pile of coins on the bedside table
I took the train, would have driven if I’d known
A pile of gold and brown in the window
I took the chance to walk where the autumn leaves had blown
These sheets have been disinfected
The ground outside has been laid bare
A ghost of cloud wonders if we meant it
And skeletons of memory vanish into sterilised air
And a storm is coming
And the train has pulled away
I’m left with an empty bed
And a fistful of promises to make
A pile of books on the bedside table
Spines are broken and the pages dry
There are words in here I could have spoken
And there are leaves I should throw into the winter sky
And a storm is coming
And the train has pulled away
I’m left with an empty bed
And a fistful of promises to make
On a windy Sunday
When the sun is sinking low
When the sea is dancing
Now I find that I don’t want to let you go
These rooms have been scrubbed and steam cleaned
And all the windows polished til they shine
There is no dirt underneath my fingernails
The weatherman says it will be sunny and fine
I’d actually like to know what you get from this song. So, let’s play a game. Stop reading this until you’ve downloaded and listened to it, then tell me in the comments what you understand from it. Think of it like book group for a song – you don’t need to know what the author intended to read and discuss it.
Go on!
And then come back and read what I have to say about it.
Which is this: it’s about loss. Der! I wrote it in 2005, when I was staying in London with Midshipman Louise and his family, and I was working through my feelings of being on the other side of the world from Australia, and of packing up my life and the flat I’d lived in for three years – goodbye, home. But it’s also about the loss of loved ones, about the instant of death and about missing it, or not being there, about hospitals, about regretting not saying what should have been said. So it’s about loss and about grief, it’s about people and place, about identity and space, and about memory.
Now, the “Three Blind Mice” bit? Random! When I was recording I realised that this fitted in to the song. I needed some more live instrumentation, and my voice happened to be right there, so I just experimented. I like the way the nursery rhyme adds another level of association to the song: I think it brings in a sense of (past) time and memory (childhood) to set against the present. Or am I just being a bit too wanky?
It’s kind of interesting to see, though, that in last week’s TOTALLY COOL song, I was all about the seasons and the weather, and time and loss and I HAVEN’T CHANGED! Whoops. I hope, though, that this is slightly less crap. Oh, man, I hope so. Please tell me it is!
Recording
Damn, this recording has given me so much grief. SO MUCH. I originally wrote it on piano, and it was a very, very simple arrangement. Honestly, it’s possible that it sounds better that way. But I don’t have a piano, so I have to make do with the GarageBand software, which is difficult to get a nice sound out of (lots of playing with EQ, let me tell you!). Because I’m playing on the computer keyboard it’s never quite on the beat, and when I change it to be in time it’s too perfect. So I added guitar, just quietly, to give the mix some warmth and humanity and not sound quite as much like karaoke. I also used drums and beats, because . . . um, BECAUSE I COULD! Because if I’m going to use the metronome and keep to a beat I might as well make the most of it. I’ve got the, uh, “Percussion Combo 09.20” drum loop all the way through, elaborated in places with “Effected Dum Kit” beat loop. Hilarious. Oh yeah, I also have some “Orchestral Strings” doing bass for me.
I’ve tried a lot of stuff with this mix, including doing a master track EQ and effects. I’ve had to do a master EQ (and compression) because goddamn it’s difficult to re-train my mixing style for myself. It is so hard to mix a deep voice and try to differentiate it from the low instruments. This one sounds a bit muddy, I think, but it’s much better than it was yesterday, and I can not look at it again or I will scream. Part of the problem is that it sounds completely different through the headphones, the good speakers and the speakers of my laptop. The usual scenario: My headphones are great, and everything is lovely and clear and well mixed. In the good speakers, the lead vocals are seven times too loud, the bass is completely blown out, and there’s fuck-all treble. In the crap speakers, there’s no bass to speak of, so the backing vocals and guitar seem to be taking over. Wah! This time I tried mainly to make it sound OK on the good speakers, though I did some tweaking using the headphones.
If any of you have any suggestions about the mix, let me know – i.e. would you prefer the vocals louder? Less bass? Less mid? More bass on the guitar? More panning? I know there are at least two of you with more mixing experience than me! Speak!
Likings and Not-Likings
I put these together today, because a lot of them are flip-sides. For instance, I like that the lead vocal doesn’t stand out as much as usual because it works more as one instrument among many. On the other hand, I really like a clear, separate vocal line in music.
I like that I can have drums, and I quite like having them in there, but I’m afraid they sound a bit tacky and fake, and are a bit repetitive.
I like the kind of fun-ness of having the nursery rhyme in there, but I wonder if it adds or detracts from the overall song?
Conclusion
Basically, it comes down to this: I like that I’ve tried out a whole heap of things, but I’m not sure about the end product. Also, I need a decent microphone, because I simply cannot convert shit recording into great mix. As they say, crap in, crap out.
As usual, if you’d like to share with people, please link to this post, rather than to the download. Thank you!
I wouldn’t mind if you only kissed my reflection
I wouldn’t mind if you only lived with my ghost
The summer sometimes seems to affect my perception
But it’s the only time when I realise just what I’ve lost
You’d take me away to the edge of the earth you decided
Take me away to the place you thought you knew well
But winter was cold and I was far less than delighted
But by then it’s too late we’d fallen under the spell
CHORUS:
When the rainbow falls from the sky I’ll believe you
When the smoke clears out of the air I will see you
When the tides stop turning, the river stops flowing, the mountains stop growing
I’ll believe you
The borders of time are something that we’ve long forgotten
And sometimes it seems that time has forgotten ourselves
“I’ll come back one day when the time’s right,” you said, “Please believe me
That time has its own way of making things turn out well.”
CHORUS:
It was summer back then
We had time on our hands
The years that divided us were something we could understand
It was summer back then
And everything seemed good
No, I have NO IDEA what it means. But you can tell it’s really profound.
This is from my *ahem* first album, Cynical Optimist, recorded when I was eighteen at a small studio in the country and produced by Matt Disney (who, tragically, died a few years ago). I’m pretty sure I wrote this when I was sixteen or seventeen. So, you can forgive the completely pretentious, utterly too-serious nature of the lyrics, can’t you? Can’t you? I don’t know if I can. And I am really embarrassed listening to my properly trained vowels. “Per-fec-shon”! “De-vah-ded”! OH GOD. MAKE IT STOP! Even at the time I was a bit annoyed at not being allowed to sing with an Australian accent (my singing teacher and the producer were married at the time).
I am so embarrassed. My toes are curling just listening to it. And the thing is? It’s not the worst song on the CD.
Recording
I don’t think I’ve uploaded any proper studio recordings here yet, have I? Well, now I have. It was the first time I’d done anything in a studio and I was incredibly nervous. Luckily Matt was lovely and put me at ease, and was enthusiastic about what I wanted to do and encouraged me to experiment with things. Actually, when I found myself on the other side of the recording process (a year or so later) I finally understood some of the stuff he had been talking about. I wish he’d shown me at the time the way the software worked – I might have been able to do a better job of some things.
Dude. There is so much reverb on this. More, even, than I would like to use myself!
So, one thing I couldn’t do in the studio was play the piano by itself – I could only sing and play at the same time. I’d never (NEVER) had someone ask me to play and sing my songs separately. This is one thing that still puts me off in studio environments (at least the studio environments of which I am not in charge!), but I’ve improved since then. Anyway, you can hear the keys of the keyboard clunking in the background of my vocal track, which is something Matt was really worried about, but I don’t mind it. Actually, I was listening to “Maybe Not” by Cat Power the other day, and realised you can hear the keys and the pedal work on that track, too. That made me really happy!
Things I Like
Well, despite the horrendous pronunciation, I quite like my voice. I never really appreciated it when I had it, when I could sing those high notes with such clarity – I always, always wanted to sing low-low-LOW. But it’s very . . . pretty. Which is why I hated it, I guess.
Things I Don’t Like
Oh dearie me. The taking-itself-so-seriously-ness of it. Thank goodness I have mostly trained myself out of that. The piano is a bit ponderous (though I blame the nerves for that), and the recorder is a bit . . . something.
Conclusion
Mockity mock! You can laugh, you can cry, you can have an epiphany. But please don’t tell me that this is your favourite of all the songs I’ve posted or I will never trust your judgement again. And I may have to commit suicide in an incredibly emo, adolescent manner.
If, for some unholy reason, you would like to link your friends to this, please send them to this post instead of directly to the download. Thanks.
My life’s a mess
And so’s my desk
It’s getting far too hard
My girlfriend left
It’s for the best
Coz she’s obsessed with Baudrillard
She believes the power of our love was just simulated
And I’m fragmented and frustrated
I’ve worked myself into a state now
I think I’ll go and defenestrate now
It seems a good way for theorists like me to go out
Deleuze did it
Maybe I’ll get a Darwin Award
It’s the only prize I’m eligible for
Given all academia believes my PhD is flawed
And Darwin’s a fraud
I didn’t evolve from the sea
Or come from that tree
Oh no
I jumped from the window
And rather than symbolic exchange
My graffiti’s just the writing on the wall
Just a fragment of my former self
If that self had a form at all
And I’ll insert a footnote as I fall
Deleuze did it
Something different today – two versions of the same song. If my memory serves me correctly, the first one I recorded at some stage in 2004. The second one I’ve been working on this week. They’re both drafts, though I’ve put a bit more effort into the second one!
Lyrics-wise . . . oh, post-whatever-ism! I’m pretty sure I wrote this either during Honours or 3rd year, when I became identifiable to others as a weird theory-nut, notably for my flailing defense of Baudrillard in a certain class (what!? I know he’s dodgy, but he’s dodgy in an hilarious way, like appropriating cowboy clothes and military-style jackets is dodgy but fun. Don’t take him too seriously and you’re fine). It’s also a result of me trying to find humour in what was (and is) an often very stressful world of academia, and has a bit of fun at the expense of academic writing styles. Which reminds me – I should find/record a version of my song that goes: You can’t blame me for not using the Harvard system you fucks! Footnote citation is perfectly appropriate! . . . Ahhh, how I’ve changed since then.
Oh, and for those who don’t know, Gilles Deleuze is a FAMOUS philosopher/theorist/whathaveyou who committed suicide in 1995 (huh, I thought it was earlier than that) by throwing himself out a window. I first heard the word ‘defenestration’, however, in The Lucksmiths’ song Goodness Gracious. Also, The Darwin Awards. Gold.
Recording
I don’t have heaps to say on this front, but I’d really like to hear what you guys suggest for making the recent version better. Please leave comments!
For the first time in my life, I’ve been able to get someone else to do a harmony that was TOO HIGH for me! Two people, in fact: Wing Commander Johnson and Midshipman Louise (Dani-Beth). They are both singing the high ‘ba-ba-baaahhh’ bits, while I am singing the lower one. Yay! Thanks, guys.
Which reminds me, this is a very harmony-heavy version. How do you feel about harmonies? Please tell me, as I really have no idea about what is excessive because I love them so.
I have continued to use the ‘Grand Piano’ software instrument from GarageBand which, on the higher notes, sounds almost like a plucked instrument (a harp, maybe?). I’ve also experimented briefly with the ‘Trumpet Section’, which you can hear on the first two ‘ba-ba-baaahhh’ bits. I forgot to put it on the last one before I uploaded it, so I’ll fix that up and re-upload the song another time when I’ve done some more work and taken your suggestions on board.
One day I’d love to do this with a full band, live. That would be fun!
Things I Like
Well, the lyrics! So many theory jokes! I am so witty! I’ve also had a couple of stop-in-my-tracks moments when I’ve heard me singing low harmonies. THAT’S MY VOICE! ALL LOW AND STUFF! Again, I’m enjoying playing with the software instruments, but I’d be interested in what you, Gentle Readers, have to say about them.
Oh! And the hilarious applause at the ending, including *ahem* someone quoting the ubiquitous line, “Show us ya tits!” We are all class, Jerry.
Things I Don’t Like
Well, it’s a draft, and the things I can pick are: clunky volume control on individual tracks and a couple of times on the master track; clunky (once again!) panning, where I need to go through and fiddle with it rather than just having each track set the whole way; the “Deleuze did it” bits and “Darwin’s a fraud” are sketchy – I didn’t have time to re-do them before uploading last night. YES! I have other things to do in my life, like prepare tutorials and do reading for my dissertation!
Mainly I think that this lacks a little bit of . . . spark. It’s getting better as I put effects on, and get the mix right, but I still think it needs something more. What is that something?!
Conclusion
I like this year’s version better than the old one, but I’m extremely keen to hear what you think. Is there something in the older one that you think could make the new one better? Let me know!
Please don’t hesitate to pimp my theory-inspired lyrical genius to the world, but link to this post rather than directly to the download. Thank you. Now, let me just go and have a look out that window . . .